Genuine Self Help

Truly effective self help relies upon actions taken and habits changed. Ineffective self-help revolves mainly around trying to follow gurus of self-help, many of whom are not practicing what they preach. Other ineffective habits include constantly learning more techniques or theories without applying any of them, ignoring your instincts, your intuition or logic in favour of a flawed belief system and repeating things that never worked in the hope that they will suddenly become effective.

Effective self help asks you to look at the reality of your life, to value the struggles you have had and to make the most of what life has thrown at you. There is no need to deny hardship nor the need to dwell on it. 

If you really want to help yourself it's a good idea to:

  • Try out a method and be as honest as possible with yourself about it's effectiveness.

  • Don't try a new theory or idea until you have actually applied some old ones.

  • Learn to listen to your own instincts.

  • Tune into your own intuition without forcing facts to fit your perceptions.

  • Get feedback from people who can be honest with and have nothing to gain from your adherence to a belief system, family culture, religion or corporate culture.

  • Use mental healing techniques on issues of perception or limiting beliefs.

  • Move through difficult emotions slowly and consistently at your own pace, without trying to force yourself to feel other than you really do.

  • Take responsibility for recurring issues in your life without blaming yourself.

  • Face your feelings without creating a logical or spiritual beliefs system that helps you avoid them.

  • Assume that you are evolving, will make mistakes and will continue to grow.

  • Throw away empty platitudes that make no sense and see the world and your part in it as realistically as possible.

  • Take action on your perceptions and change what you need to change in your life.

  • Accept that you want what you want and that you don't want to want something else because it's more spiritual or logical or will help you avoid yourself.

  • Assume that all aspects of your being have the part to play in your life, that discipline is required to channel their energy appropriately.

  • Assume that suppressing your genuine self leads to illness of one sort or another.

  • MOST IMPORTANTLY find someone who can hold you accountable for doing your best to make actual progress and who will confront you if you merely create the illusion on progress.

Helping Yourself starts with declaring that you are:

1. Unique

2. Valuable

3. Worthy of your own truth